


Mendeleev's Table

by TaeyongsPoorHair



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! - All Media Types, Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Kaiba Seto Needs a Hug, M/M, Post-Canon, Post-Dark Side Of Dimensions, and some kind of closure, oh no wait...that's me. i need closure
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-25
Updated: 2020-06-25
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:02:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24900505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TaeyongsPoorHair/pseuds/TaeyongsPoorHair
Summary: They say Mendeleev dreamt of the periodic table.For most of his life, Seto Kaiba calls bullshit.Seto dreams of a way to bring the Pharaoh back but fails to consider that he might not be as eager to return as Seto thought.
Relationships: Kaiba Seto & Yami Yuugi, Kaiba Seto/Yami Yuugi, Kaiba Seto/Yami Yuugi | Atem
Comments: 4
Kudos: 46





	Mendeleev's Table

They say Mendeleev dreamt of the periodic table.

For most of his life, Seto Kaiba calls bullshit.

The periodic table is a complex puzzle seemingly following a natural order that starts with rising atomic mass, classified by the number of valence electrons, organized in a way that electronegativity grows gradually from francium, on the bottom left, to fluorine, on the top right, when half of the now known elements hadn’t been discovered yet and people expect Seto to believe Mendeleev figured it out when his brain activity was at its lowest.

The old man spending too much time hunched over his table, trying to find relations between sixty-three different collections of protons, neutrons, and electrons and putting the last, missing pieces together in a state of delirium seems much more likely. Gods know, how often his own projects had haunted Seto’s dreams during the few nights he’d sleep long enough in one go to dream, but the first versions of the duel disk were the results, not of his subconscious, but hard work and his own genius.

Then there’s a change of perspective. Two modifications to his carefully crafted equations. A new variable throwing a different kind of light on a problem, he refuses to acknowledge as such. The last thing he sees is a head of tri-colored hair, inviting him into a white pod with KaibaCorp’s logo on the hood in bold letters.

Seto wakes with a start and calls bullshit on his own theory.

  
  


The first thing Seto does upon his return from the Afterlife is take a breath.

Every duel he’s fought since hearing of him leaving has been dull in comparison. The thrill of finally facing his rival again was one of a kind. The AI was nothing but a poor excuse of a replacement and he’s yet to find a way to recreate the feeling accurately. Unfortunately, there’s nothing quite like the rush of adrenaline he only feels when drawing his trusted friend, Blue Eyes, to counter the Dark Magician’s black magic. Solid Vision’s limited by his imagination only, but even he, Seto Kaiba, couldn’t do justice to the Pharaoh’s memory.

So yes, Seto Kaiba had a great time in the majestic palace hidden between golden dunes and the Pharaoh’s smile haunted him all the way back to his space station, but none of that changes the fact that his knees gave in the second he tried to step out of the white, interdimensional pod. It doesn’t erase the lines of worry on Mokuba’s young face or the sound of his distressed voice as he called for his brother hidden behind medical staff.

His head is pounding, limbs as heavy as lead and though he refuses to be carried on a mat, he does have to lean on Isono as the elevator speeds down, bringing them back to earth.

Despite the two days of bed rest Mokuba orders, Seto Kaiba falls asleep with a rare smile on his face.

He refuses to tell Mokuba the outcome of their duel. His brother tries to pry the information out of him, almost gets him on a couple of occasions when Seto’s eyes are heavy and mind unfocused–Seto expects no less from him, even if his little tricks present themselves as minor inconveniences.

Seto also forbids Mokuba to tell anyone from the nerd brigade of his little adventure to another realm. He can tell his brother is reluctant to lie, even by omission, but he respects Seto’s wishes.

A week later, Seto is running his company, working on prototypes, striving for perfection and more, as if nothing ever happened and his journey to the Afterlife had been but a dream. Yugi and his friends keep inviting them to their outings, Seto keeps refusing, barely getting out of his office. Mokuba yells at him for neglecting their friends. _"If I can lie to them, then so can you,”_ he says leaving no place for discussions and dragging Seto to BurgerWorld. Seto feigns annoyance a few hours into the outing and tells Mokuba their leaving, but only way after dessert and at least three rounds in the arcade. His brother smiles at him in the car and Seto throws his clothes into the next washing machine he can find to get rid of the smell of burning oil, that’s been haunting him all evening.

KaibaCorp launches the new duel disk. Seto personally announces the next tournament and life goes on, even for Seto who’s been obsessed with the possibility of a rematch for the greater part of the year. Now, he focuses on the company and though he still spends an unhealthy amount hunched over his desk, at least now there seems to be a little less anger and pain pulling his shoulders down.

Mokuba hopes his brother is finally ready to move on from the bitter past that started with a torn card.

  
  


Seto build the pod with one goal in mind. A rematch, fair and square, to finally settle who the real _King of the Games_ is. Honest to Gods, it started as a one-time deal. A way to get the closure he’s been denied in Egypt, when the Pharaoh walked through the stone door without so much as a message for him, to be delivered by his supposed friends. Seto tells himself he’s content with the way things ended up, but a few months into his new routine, he finds himself frowning over his deck after another duel won but lacking the usual feeling of fulfillment. It takes him three days to accept that no one he’s fought since his return has come close to bringing him the joy, he felt with _him._ A week later Seto’s holding on to the wheel of his modified pod and so one time, turns into two.

If the Pharaoh’s surprised to see him, he doesn’t show. Instead, he smiles, asks for his duel disk and privacy, and they duel in the throne room, then move on to other board games in the Pharaoh’s rooms. From chess to dice, the Pharaoh turns every challenge into an addicting experience, that Seto craves as much as he longs for the slight curl of lips, the smile reserved for Seto and Seto only, it seems.

A week later, Mokuba won’t let him go back. _”Once every four months,”_ is his condition, _”Or I’ll blow the station to hell.”_ Knowing his brother, and expecting him to make good on the threat, Kaiba buys a white paper book calendar, keeps it under his pillow and starts crossing out days.

  
  


It’s not like Seto has any room to complain. KaibaCorp is thriving, Mokuba’s healthy and safe and he gets to challenge his dead rival once every couple months. The thought of bringing the Pharaoh back into the realm of the living rarely crossed his mind, yet here he is arms buried deep in an engine of the prototype of a machine he’s not sure will even work, following a hunch and a dream, of all things, to make the impossible possible.

Seto stays optimistic. A forty-three percent success rate is more than he had when he started working on the first pod. Death couldn’t stop him from getting his rematch and Seto wasn’t about to start obliging to the rules of the universe like a peasant. He won't stop until he hits a hundred. 

And ten, for good measure.

He tries to keep it a secret from Mokuba at first, but his little brother catches on when Seto disappears in the lab under the KaibaCorp headquarters for a night to many and doesn’t know whether to praise his genius, when seeing the equations, or beat it out of him.

  
  


“How do you know he even wants to come back?” Mokuba asks him one evening on a plane to Italy while Seto’s running calculations again.

“Resting your bones on a golden throne, in silken clothes for eternity would please anyone,” Seto admits and then meets his brother’s gaze. “Not him.”

So, Seto keeps working and building even when the compressor explodes too close to his face for Mokuba’s liking and hot oil leaves angry marks on Seto’s wrists.

  
  


Yugi Mutou storms into his office as Seto’s replying to emails at the end of a long workday. He doesn’t have to guess what he’s here for. Mokuba texted him to warn him and apologized for messing up. Seto sends him a white dragon holding up two thumbs and then dismisses his secretary who keeps rambling _apologies, but Mr. Mutou just walked in without listening._

Seto pays him no mind until Yugi stands in front of him, hands pressed flat against the smooth glass of his desk.

“You’ve been visiting him.”

He doesn’t miss the accusatory tone in Yugi’s voice. It annoys Seto, angers him even but he doesn’t let it show and keeps typing.

“I have.”

“I want to see him,” Yugi says and Seto scoffs. Taking a few inches in size must have gotten to his head if he thinks he can waltz in as if he owns the place and demand things from Seto.

“No.”

“I have as much right to see him as you, Kaiba. I’m also his friend,” Yugi says through gritted teeth.

Seto looks up to meet his eyes. In the orange light, the soft purple of Yugi’s irises burns red and full of anger. 

“That’s rich coming from you. Considering you’re the reason he’s stuck there in the first place.” Seto leans back and crosses his arms daring Yugi to look away. His mouth drops open, but Yugi doesn’t break under Seto’s ocean blue eyes. 

“That’s not what happened and you know that. He would’ve been stuck in the puzzle for another three thousand years had I lost the duel. Is that the fate you wished for him?” he argues but Seto’s long past the point of listening to excuses.

“No, but you certainly didn’t try to find a way to keep him here.” 

His eyes widen, guilt flashes across Yugi’s face and Seto knows he’s hit where it hurts. Knows he should stop here. Seto hates that they’re having this conversation right now. Hates that he started caring, to then be left behind, like dust in a corner. Hadn’t it been him who forced Seto to get his shit back together and start anew? For all the talk about how life’s worth living, worth fighting for, the Pharaoh hasn’t thought twice before walking into his grave. 

Seto still feels the ghost of Exodia’s hand crushing his chest whenever the night drags on for a little too long and sleep refuses to take him, leaving him defenseless against his own thoughts and feelings. Feelings of pain and betrayal because no matter how you twist it, for all the talk about friendship and respect, the Pharaoh hasn’t bothered with goodbye.

Seto’s tired of feeling like’s lost something he’s never had. He needs a win, so why not use the opportunity, when Yugi’s right there, vulnerable and defenseless and Seto’s habits–no matter how ugly–die hard.

“You used him while it was convenient and threw him away the second you didn’t need him.”

Yugi stumbles back, his hands sliding off the desk and falling to rest on his sides. A cruel smirk creeps onto Seto’s face as Yugi swallows hard.

“You’re an asshole, Kaiba, and the last person who deserves him.”

Yugi walks out and takes whatever sense of victory Seto’s felt with him.

  
  


Seto walks into the throne room feeling as if he’s just had three coffees. His head is buzzing with excitement, the way he feels before showing Mokuba his newest project. He smiles as the Pharaoh walks down the stairs anticipating the upcoming duel every bit as much as Seto himself. 

It’s a hot day, even for Egyptian standards, and by the time one life points bar has dropped to zero, Seto his sweating under his gear. As usual, the Pharaoh invites him into the garden where they sit in amiable silence in the shadows of a palm tree. 

“You’re unusually happy,” the Pharaoh says and leans back against the cold stone wall behind the bench they’re sitting on.

“I don’t what you mean, Pharaoh. I’m a ray of sunshine, even on my darkest days,” Seto counters but can’t keep his lips from curling upwards. His smile shifts, now rather smug than playful and Seto decides it’s time to tell him of his latest project. “I’ve found a way to bring you home.”

He rushes his words and feels stupidly nervous as he watches the Pharaoh ‘s eyes grow wide. 

Seto’s face heats up, but he blames it on the blazing sun. “I’m still working on it, but it should be ready by the time I get back here.”

The Pharaoh still hasn’t moved an inch or breathed a sound. Seto thinks he broke him when the Pharaoh throws him a look he can’t quite read.

“ _This_ is my home, Kaiba,” he says softly as if Seto’d break with the words.

“This,” Seto replies waving his hand from one end of the eternal garden to another. “Is your grave.” It takes one look at the guilt and _pity_ on the Pharaoh’s face for it to dawn on him. “You don’t want to come back with me.”

The Pharaoh searches for the right words but his brain fails him when Seto stands up and hides his pain under a mask of anger. 

“I’ve fulfilled my mission. This is where I was destined to be,” the Pharaoh argues.

“Destiny is an excuse you hide behind because you’re too scared to try living for yourself, you coward.”

The Pharaoh steps forward in one swift motion until he stands right in front of Seto. His eyes are burning and brows furrowed but voice controlled with only the faintest hint of annoyance.

“I’m not scared of anything, but my time is over. It has been for three thousand years. There’s no place for me there.”

“You’d always have a place by my side,” Seto yells feeling desperate, a feeling that he doesn’t like, he decides. “You just don’t want it.”

The Pharaoh is stunned into silence. The scowl falls off his face and makes place for something gentle. Seto’s drawn to those dark, crimson eyes.

“Kaiba,” he whispers, breaking the silence, pulling Seto back into their fight.

“Don’t call me that,” he snaps. “I have a name.”

“So, do I but all I ever get from you is my title.”

Seto looks away, turns around to brush his hair back and breathe until the pressure behind his eyelids fades. It doesn’t and Seto feels helpless. He hasn’t considered, not once, that Mokuba might have a point. He was so sure the Pharaoh–no, _Atem_ –would be glad to get his life back.

 _Maybe he doesn’t want it because_ that _wasn’t his life to begin with_. Seto banishes that thought. Locks it up and throws away the key.

“Fine then,” Seto begins, slowly, careful not to let his voice crack and keep it steady instead. “Whoever draws the monster card with higher attack points wins.”

Atem scowls and steps back, almost offended. “That’s my life you’re talking about, Kaiba, not something to gamble with.”

“You had no problem throwing your life on the line before.”

“That was different. My friends were in danger, I had to save them.”

“Why are their lives more worth than yours?”

Atem stills, lets his shoulders drop and looks away. His shoulders hunch under Seto’s icy glare as the latter waits for an answer. He won’t get one, and if he does, he won’t like it, _so really_ , Seto thinks, _what’s the point_.

There isn’t one he concludes, as he watches his old rival struggle, searching for words, they both know won’t change anything.

Seto turns around. 

This time, he’s the one to leave without goodbye.

  
  


The one emotion Seto has always welcomed is anger. 

Anger is easy.

Anger doesn’t render him useless for days on end. Doesn’t make him want to curl up in his bed and give up. Instead, it gives him the strength to push through and keep going, so that’s who he turns to instead of allowing himself to grieve.

Seto forgets, that sometimes, anger brings destruction.

Mokuba stops him before Seto can get his hands on the prototype, but the board and all its equations are gone. For once, he’s glad his big brother insists on digitalizing everything down to the last dot. He watches Seto leave, after shaking Mokuba off. It’s past midnight, Seto’s back earlier than usual and Mokuba figures his talk with Atem must have turned out differently than his brother has hoped for.

It takes two weeks for Seto to stop snapping at everyone who stares at him for two seconds too long. Yugi comes by to argue again and Seto hates seeing him and his stupid hair. He tells him as much, but Yugi brushes his spiteful comments off and demands to see the Pharaoh.

Yugi pesters him until he gives in, tired of fighting his friend and himself. He gives him an address, has Yugi sign a liability waiver in the elevator and sends him off to his playdate in a suit Seto’s designed for him.

Yugi’s back twelve hours later, smiling brighter than ever as he steps out of the pod. Seto's kind enough to hold out his hand to keep him and his short frame steady, but he isn't expecting for Yugi to suddenly lean on him and bury his head in Seto’s chest. 

Seto’s about to call for a doctor—he knows how much the journey strains both body and soul—when he hears a sob, quiet and muffled by Seto’s blue coat. He has half the mind not to push him away when Yugi’s small fingers curl into tight fists creasing the carefully pressed shirt underneath. Seto’s not used to people being this close and his fingers twitch with the need for space.

He barely catches the boy, when he feels Yugi’s knees giving. Yugi’s shoulders shake with each whimper and sob and it hurts _so_ much, but Seto refuses to cry. Not here, not now, not after all this time, when he’s kept his composure for so long, but he agrees to be a decent human being for once and tightens his grip around Yugi until he calms down.

The ride down is quiet save for the mechanical voice of Seto’s AI. Yugi looks lost in thought, and though Seto wants to know what happened, they don’t talk about it that night. Or ever.

  
  


Seto crosses out the last blank day, before the aggressively circled square and sighs. He doesn’t have to go today, or tomorrow. In fact, he could wait till next month, because he's the only one to dictate Seto Kaiba’s schedule, but deep down he knows that would be running and that’s a mistake he won’t make twice.

Atem convinced Seto to keep on living and fight the demons of his past once. He’ll be damned if he doesn’t return the favor. 

Seto goes back to Afterlife’s ancient Egypt.

It’s hot and sweaty like it always is. Atem sits atop his thrones like he always does. Seto wishes to say they duel like they always do.

Instead, Atem comes down the stairs to stand before his friend. Seto meets Atem’s gaze. Calm, composed, calculating.

He knows Atem’s content and at peace here. Were he anyone else, he’d respect the Pharaoh’s wishes but he’s Seto Kaiba and giving up is the one class he skipped in school.

“You can’t possibly be satisfied trapped in this overgrown sandcastle. Tell me you're happy here and I’ll never speak of it again.”

Atem narrows his brows, tilts his head to the side as if questioning Seto’s honesty. “I’m at peace here,” he says and Seto almost laughs, because that’s exactly what he’s thought but also–

“That wasn’t my question.”

A moment passes. Seto hears his heartbeat in his ears. He sees the moment Atem’s resolve crumbles. Knows he's won when Atem snaps.

“Screw you, Seto.”

And that’s…not how Seto imagined hearing his first name fall from Atem’s lips for the first time.

“Of course, I want to live,” he continues, voice rising with every word, letting go of built-up frustration, letting it break like water through a dam. “I died when I was 16 and spent three thousand years surrounded by darkness. I _want_ to live. I _want_ to feel the rain fall on a body that’s mine, remember what wine tasted like and how and witness the sunrise, even just once more. There is so much left, I haven’t tried. So many firsts that I didn’t get to have, but who am I to defy fate?”

__

__

Seto looks, for the first time really looks, and sees the teenager mourning his own death, but accepting it silently, knowing there’s no place left for him in a world that didn’t bother remembering him. 

“I don’t know who you are,” he says, voice but a whisper as if afraid the Gods will hear if spoken too loudly. “But the person I chose as my rival, never ran from a challenge.”

A gleam flickers through Atem’s eyes. A spark, Seto knows, he’s the only one to bring out in him, so he holds out his hand, with the promise of a future, and isn’t surprised when Atem takes it, with a burning will to live.

**Author's Note:**

> the periodic table is crazy and idk how mendeleev did that but he did and I wanted to share my amazement and also put to use what i've learned about compressors in thermodynamics, even if that means mentioning them only, like, once, but hey sometimes that's where life takes you and that's okay. no but really, what's the point of studying engineering if i'm not gonna boast and pretend to be smart on the internet, amirite?
> 
> anywayyy, this whole mess started back in january, when i was supposed to be studying for exaaams, but watched two seasons of yugioh instead. i kinda dropped it until a couple weeks ago, because i needed another excuse not to study for exaaams and binged season three on netflix. at last, i read the memories retrieval arc and even tho i knew how it ended...what the actual fuck? you're really gonna leave like that? atem? yami? yugi's other self? my dude? my man? seto's, mine and everybody's crush? so, naturally, i watched dsod immediately after, thinking HE'S COMING BACK HE HAS TO and then he appeared and that scene gave me goosebumps, that was some thor infinity war entrance level shit, but then he left??? and i guess, it makes sense. i understand why he left, i really, really do and seeing yugi so grown up and standing up to seto made me feel like a proud mom
> 
> but...he was supposed to come back, man. i wanted closure but that movie didn't help. so i read a ton (not really a dozen maybe) post dsod fics and they were absolutely great (most of them) but i still didn't feel good. 
> 
> now, this exists bc i need to get yugioh, and seto, and the hot pharaoh that i'm still...after all these years..crushing on so hard, out of my head.
> 
> honestly tho, i started writing this because the first two sentences haunted me for DAYS and i had to get them out of my system, bc seto seems like the type to make fun of old, genius scientists.
> 
> one thing i liked about dsod is that they didn't tell who won the rematch and kinda kept that going throughout this fic. also...we need more yugi/seto bonding moments. i know i did a pretty shit job at that but i also don't pretend to be a good writer who knows how to flesh out scenes in a compelling way that draws people in and makes them _feel_. so to all you talented writers out there. more yugi/seto bonding moments pls.
> 
> find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/tyspoorhair) xD
> 
> ps: pretty sure these are the longest notes i've written so far but i needed to vent i'm sorry ^^


End file.
